An open door

It is with great anticipation of what might grow out of this space that I start my first blog post, and officially welcome you to this new endeavor.  I am excited to see where we might go together on this adventure. 

Here is a secret about me - I am an adventure junkie, well sort of. 

Not the kind of adventure junkie that’s into bungee jumping or leaping out of airplanes, but the kind that is continually challenging myself to try new places and experiences.  One of my favorite things in the world is to be heading out with a backpack on my back to a new location. 

Or trying a new restaurant way off the beaten path.  Stepping into a new class where I don’t know anyone, or striking up a conversation with a total stranger. 

Every time I step outside of my comfort zone, I give myself a little internal high five, because I didn’t always act like this, and I like to reward my bravery whenever possible. 

In fact, I used to be pretty timid and scared, preferring the comforts of home, the place and patterns with well-known expectations.  No unexpected surprises or possible mishaps - even if those expectations had become a little worn out and less shiny around the edges I still followed those same patterns each day, hesitant to try out anything that might represent the unknown. 

What changed me you might ask?  I often ask the same question, when I find myself walking into an unknown situation, nervous as all get up, wiping the sweat off my hands, and reminding myself to take deep breaths. 

In reality, I think it happened in baby steps.  

And certainly, through the invitation of others.   It came about as I saw my life become smaller and smaller with time when what I really wanted was to be expansive and daring.  It came about when I stopped using the word “no” as my go-to answer and started whispering “yes” more often, despite the risks. 

To start I would challenge myself to try new things, little things that felt manageable.  To choose the more mysterious and unknown and not the well-trod path of the familiar.   One day it might have been picking a new restaurant for lunch (thanks to Yelp for making this easier to negotiate).

Another day it might have been a commitment to not spend all my thoughts on being afraid. 

I forced myself to replace each scary thought, that always included destruction and worse case scenarios, with positive outcomes.  I would ask myself, “Noelle, what is the worse thing that could happen here?” and then, I would answer myself, and the answers never seemed as big or scary as I had imagined they would be.

 It was through the guidance of a good friend that took me on adventures to new places and reawakened in me a sense of wonder and gratitude.  It was through traveling to new places, or I should say, through the process of becoming less obsessed with comfort and sameness when I traveled, and instead opening myself to new sights, meeting new people, eating new food,  getting on public transportation, staying small and local, getting off the beaten path.  It was all these things and more.  A practice that has become a daily conversation I now have with myself.

As I became more adventurous I found that I became lighter, freer, and less focused on the outcome of each situation, less in need of being in control all the time. 

I found that it was the experience that matters, the being present to the what “is”, and what might happen, that makes it worth the challenge.  Even when the outcome is less than perfect (and trust me this happens a lot) I still feel more alive and present, more like I am living the way that God wants me to live. 

I let go of fear and welcomed in the unknown, finding it so unbelievably beautiful. 

Over time it has become a little bit easier.  I still get nervous, but my desire for the adventure overrides the fear, and I move forward with great expectation.

This blog is my next leap into the unknown, and although my fingers are shaking as I write these words, I am thrilled to be stepping through this open door into unchartered territory.   Saying yes when it would be easier to say no.  To remain comfortable instead of stretching and reaching. 

I hope that you too find yourself moving more in the direction of adventure as well.  That you find yourself more and more ready to leave the comfy couch of the known and try something new and a bit scary. 

It is in the stretching that we become fully alive, and able to see the beauty that is so present in this world. 

So next time you find yourself shaking in your boots, and your inclination is to shake your head and go back to the familiar; square your shoulders, take a deep breath and jump in.  The adventure awaits. 

So happy to be along on this adventure with you. 

Let's see what's behind that door, shall we?