Release Part II - 11/17/21

Last Friday we left Arizona and made our way down to Texas.

It was a long three days of driving. Too far to cover in three days (and we keep telling ourselves we aren’t going to do that anymore).

But we had a goal in mind. To spend a week in San Antonio before making our way down to Padre Island National Seashore for the Thanksgiving holiday. There is no WIFI or cell coverage down there so we can only go when we have time off - and that happens to be next week around the Thanksgiving holiday. So decision made - we covered about 1200 miles in three days. Well over our limit of 300 miles per day. And it was exhausting.

Add in that I have not been feeling well for the past week, and had a horrible headache, and upset tummy the whole way. Oh, and there was that fight we had as we drove through El Paso. (Long driving days make for grumpy travelers.)

Which resulted in us not really speaking to each other for another couple hundred of miles. And then the RV park we planned to stay at that night looked like something out of the Living Dead so we had to keep going.

Finally spending the night in the back parking lot of a Cracker Barrel in Kerrville, Texas.

It wasn’t all bad though. We did have a lovely first night at a Harvest Host winery in New Mexico - waking up to a frosty morning where I took the dogs out for a good long romp across the fields and grass where they tumbled and played with utter delight. And we found a new route from Phoenix bypassing the traffic of Tucson and passing through some spectacular scenery. And since we were already parked in the back of the Cracker Barrel I didn’t have to make dinner, or breakfast for that matter. And we drove down through the hill country on a very twisty and tiny road that I think I would like to live on some day if I ever return to a real house. So not all bad.

By Sunday we arrived in San Antonio wiped out. Dirty from no showers for the week we were in Arizona and our long weekend on the road. A PILE of dirty laundry and the girls SO done with the car. Biggest Betty was in need of a good wash but I was still not feeling well. So, while I took a three hour nap, (yes you read that right) Jason scoured our house from top to bottom. Gifting me with a sparkling clean shower when I woke up and then took me out to dinner.

I spent all day Monday doing laundry and dropping a small fortune into the washer and dryers.

The past few days have been about settling in while still struggling with this icky tummy. I finally woke up this morning, looked at Jason and said, “I am wiped out”. I keep pulling all my stuff out to work each day and the reality is I have no drive or energy to do anything.

Yesterday I laid in one of our recliner camp chairs and read in the afternoon light. Nothing written except one excerpt for a possible now poem.

Nothing much accomplished other than clean bodies and a clean camper. And a few meetings for us both.

Sometimes I wonder what to say in this travel log, what to write. I hope each time that I have some bit of wisdom or noticing that has risen to the surface. But it’s not always the case.

What I have today is this:

The sun is shining and the weather in San Antonio is lovely. And I am glad we struggled through those three days to get here.

The squirrels are busy scouring the campground for leftover acorns and giving me the impression that a long winter is ahead.

The opalescent black birds with the long beaks are singing their haunting songs, sounding like a soundtrack for fall and harvest moons.

The moon is almost full now and I am looking forward to watching it rise tonight - bathing in its milky light.

There is a breeze blowing in from the open windows in Biggest Betty reminiscent of soft blankets, and cozy days spent on the couch with nothing much to do.

I am in the middle of a good book - a new mystery series I have just discovered and I am only three books in - so I have no need to worry about this one ending too soon.

Jason’s birthday is Saturday and I can’t wait to celebrate his life in this world.

We are heading to the Gulf on Sunday - and there is no cell coverage where we are staying so I have no need to stay connected - I can just linger and watch the waves, and the girls running up and down the beach in reckless abandon.

I am going to spend the next couple of days in my kitchen prepping food for our trip. I love spending days cooking - finding it super relaxing and satisfying. On the docket are two different kinds of garden burgers, a new carrot coconut soup I just found , and Jason’s birthday cake. Maybe some muffins or scones.

I may write something over the next week - I may not.

I will most certainly lay out in the sunshine this afternoon and allow my body to continue resting and healing.

The reality is that I am releasing all outcomes.

Releasing the week ahead.

Releasing all the best laid plans.

Releasing my constant need to produce to make me feel like I am living.

Releasing my body from worry so my stomach can find calmness again.

Releasing my need to pick up my phone and make sure I have not missed some important piece of data.

I am releasing it all.

And picking up some wisdom from the dogs.

They really do now how to lay around and watch the world go by. And I am pretty sure they are never thinking about what they “should” be doing instead.

If I don’t pop back in here again this week or next - Happy Thanksgiving to you all.

I will see you on the other side of our time at the Gulf. Relaxed, restored and released.