For the past couple of years Jason and I have been exploring how to live into a new word, “isness”. I am not sure how we stumbled on it but it has become a companion that is helping us to live into the moment - especially when those moments don’t go exactly as we imagined.

Late on Friday, as I was thinking about our plans for the weekend, and wondering how to fit in posting here too, I started to feel stress coming on so I came to an impromptu decision - I decided I would not post anything here on the weekends. As soon as I made that decision, I felt a deep sense of calm and peace come over me. Little did I know that the weekend would really not lend itself to a daily log anyway - it was enough to just be in the moments of those days, the “isness” of it all.

Both days were full, Saturday with lots of discoveries, Sunday with some big challenges. That is the interesting thing with “isness”, it isn’t just about the interesting or the difficult, it is about learning to be with what is - no matter the situation. This is not easy. I like to be in control. Not so much in a negative way but in a way that likes to feel that I have some control over the situations I find myself in from day to day. When I start to feel that slipping away, I can get anxious and worried. So I practice settling into the “isness” - slowly practicing letting go - and letting what is be what it is.

Saturday we had a lovely time touring San Antonio. We got breakfast, we went to the Pearl Farmer’s Market, and then spent the afternoon following the Mission Road trail that connects five Spanish missions from the 1700’s.

Sunday we had to change camp so we can get our residency sorted out. It was supposed to be an easy drive so we took a leisurely Sabbath morning, broke down camp, and headed out. About half way through our drive our tire blew out on the camper. And it didn’t just blow out - it was in shreds. We were stuck for two hours on the side of the road trying to get it changed. It was hot and frustrating and a little bit scary.

I know that I would like life to always be easy but it is more often an adventure - that includes bumps, flexibility and trust. Enter the “isness”.

There is a quote from Hamlet that one of our former pastor has at the bottom of his email. It says, “there is nothing good or bad, but thinking makes it so”. I think Shakespeare knew something about the “isness” of being. It is not good or bad, it just is. More often what makes the situation good or bad is how we move through it.

Leaning into the “isness” seems to help me release the worry and just be with what is as it comes; whether it be a lovely day of touring, or a few hours stuck on the side of a busy highway. It is all still life - happening around and through me - and I want to be present for each moment as it comes.